


Dust

by ElizaStyx



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angelic Grace, Angst, Captivity, Demon Dean, Dubious Consent, Emotional Hurt, Hand Jobs, Healing, I'm Going to Hell, I'm Sorry, Loss of Grace, M/M, Pain, Psychological Torture, Rape, Suicidal Thoughts, Wings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-28
Updated: 2014-12-28
Packaged: 2018-03-04 00:48:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2903210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElizaStyx/pseuds/ElizaStyx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He had no purpose any longer, he had no reason to carry on, nothing to keep him greeting any of the passing precious hours of his life.</p><p>Dean Winchester, the only love and hope of his life, was gone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dust

If this was a new day, it was no different from the ones that had come before. Darkness. Fear. Loneliness.

And hunger.

Hunger for some relief, for salvation, for the end but... no longer for love because there was none of it any more in the one he wanted it from.  
What little was left there of those human feelings he once called love could have been only named lust now.  
Desire for pleasure he no longer understood.  
It was hidden right beneath the surface of brutal indifference but it was there and it was yet to be acted on. That day was just as good as any other to be the final one and Castiel prayed for it to be.

He had no purpose any longer, he had no reason to carry on, nothing to keep him greeting any of the passing precious hours of his life.

Dean Winchester, the only love and hope of his life, was gone.

Not dead, which would hurt but still leave them with a chance to meet in heaven, no. If anything could bring more pain than death, it was exactly what had happened.  
Dean became his own worst nightmare and was on a mission to destroy the single dearest and sweetest dream he had ever had - Castiel.

The angel had lost count of the time in the darkness of the little barn he was held in. He couldn't sense his hands anymore after being cuffed to the ceiling for so long. What little was left of his powers kept him alive but it wasn't enough to let him break down barriers that kept him locked.

Maybe he wouldn't fight them even if he could though.

The dull pain that accompanied him wasn't the worst part of it. The waiting was. He didn't know when or even **if** Dean, or rather the demon he turned into, would come and end his misery.  
He prayed for him to hurry up.

And so he knew he was really too far gone, when the demon finally came and all he felt was peaceful relief.

The smile, once the most beautiful of them all, was wicked, twisted with all the darkness that was creeping from inside the rotten soul of the righteous man. Seeing its decay was a worse torture than any physical harm that could have been done to him.  
"Hey, Cas." the familiarity of this voice was killing him.  
All the sweet memories were being tainted, stripped from their beauty and left to die in torment.

Castiel didn't answer. If he called him by the old name, it would only make it more real.

"So you don't wanna talk to me..." the green eyes were dark and dangerous, inhuman; it would hurt less to see them black. "Shame but... we will work on that."  
Castiel shivered as the demon approached him and cupped his face surprisingly gently. He closed his eyes, unable to watch that awful smile on those lips.  
"Look at me, my love." Castiel wished he could unhear those words.  
They shouldn't have been said this way, not after all those years he was patiently waiting for them.  
"Look at me..." a calm whisper, almost begging, enough for the angel to hesitate and open his eyes with hope.

But Dean was not there.

Castiel could see the real face of the demon and he couldn't hold back the tears, knowing how beautiful a soul had been lost.  
"Don't cry, Cas." words as sweet as the gentle touch on his wet cheeks, thumbs caressing his tormented skin. "I'm gonna make you feel better, angel." hands wandering down onto his chest and belly. "Exactly as you dreamed about it."  
"No, please, no." salty drops were rolling down his face as his body reacted to the warm fingers crawling underneath his shirt and unzipping his pants. "Please..." his voice was broken, full of plea.

"Spread your wings for me, baby." demon's strokes were lazy, hypnotizing and erotic, just like Castiel always imagined Dean's would be. "You love it, don't you?"  
"I... I can't..." Castiel felt betrayed by his own organism, his head hung low as the pleasure was building up in his stomach, breaking his heart in two.  
"I feel the grace in you, Cas." demon's voice was a sweet purr, destroying all the fantasies Castiel had about it. "You can show me your wings. Feel the pleasure, give in to my touch and spread them. Let them show how much you desire me."  
"I can't..." Castiel couldn't stop the sobs from escaping his mouth.  
"Do it, baby." the squeezes became more forceful, more demanding. "For me." he was good at pretending there was affection in his voice, a spark of humanity.

Maybe if Castiel kept his eyes shut, he could pretend this was all that he wanted.

"Kiss me..." he whispered, giving up. "Kiss me, Dean."  
The touch of those plush lips was exactly as tender as he imagined, almost making him believe this was really Dean pressed against him, finally unashamed to show his love. This maybe was the closest he could get, close enough to be worth it.

Castiel could feel the last drops of the grace leaving his body as his black wings rose above them, still majestic and beautiful even after his soul had been shattered into pieces.  
"Dean!" he cried, sharply beating them one last time before they turned into a cloud of blinding, sparkling dust as the final wave of orgasm hit him.

And suddenly all the sensations were gone.  
There was no touch, no pain.  
Castiel felt unreal, opening his eyes.

And then there was him, curled on the floor, sobbing just like Castiel had been before.  
"Dean?" the angel couldn't tell if his voice was even audible, he felt so light.  
"Cas?" the sobs stopped abruptly and a pair of shining green eyes looked up at Castiel's calm face.

They were pure. There was no darkness in them, no hatered, no filthy desire, just sorrow.  
And love.  
"Dean..." Castiel smiled softly, his heart full of joy he had thought he would never feel again.

This time the darkness that greeted him was loving. It felt safe like a mother's embrace.  
Castiel was no longer afraid.

**Author's Note:**

> You may interpret the ending the way you want. Your desire to murder me after reading this story is completely normal and fully understandable.


End file.
